Tuesday, November 29, 2011

A loss of one of Britain's under-appreciated film directors

It’s a sign I’m getting old when the authors and filmmakers that inspired me as a youth are exiting this world. Last week we lost the Grand Dragon-lady of Pern, Anne McCaffrey. This week one of Britain’s more flamboyant and iconoclastic film directors, Ken Russell, died at the age of 84. Sadly, his vision and talent never really found a home in either Hollywood or the British film industry, and he struggled to find funding in his later years.

While best known for The Devils and the Oscar-winning Woman in Love, which earned Russell a nomination for Best Director, I’ll always have a soft spot for his campy cult horror classics Gothic and The Lair of the White Worm. Here’s a clip of the delectable Amanda Donohoe vamping it up as Lady Sylvia Marsh in the latter film (won't allow me to embed unfortunately):


If you ever wondered how the characters in my stories "Naga Special Massage" and "Naga Massage Review" got their names, now you know.

Saturday, November 26, 2011

Fun Things to do on a Black Friday

We don’t have Black Friday in Britain. The term confused me for a while as Black [Insert Weekday] in Britain is used for points in history when whatever moron we had for a chancellor at the time spunked millions (or billions) of pounds up a wall. I suppose the nearest equivalent we do have is the Boxing Day sales after Christmas.

I’m a bad person. Ok, that’s a lie. I’m a good person, probably boring by most people’s standards, but I do have bad bad thoughts.

After reading about the scrums, crushes and even shoppers using pepper spray on each other, impish little ideas started to germinate in my corroded black cortex. Wouldn’t it be fun to go to one of these stores, where people have been queuing outside all night and are grumpy and sleep-deprived, and hand out swords and maces like a regular Leland Gaunt. Out of idle curiosity…to see what happens next…

Hopefully, nobody actually died today, otherwise this blog post might be rather inappropriate.

I think I’d find it hard to be too sympathetic. All death is ignoble, but being trampled in a stampede to get the latest Playstation for a hundred dollars less has to be one of the more depressing and pointless ways to exit this earth. I’m being a curmudgeony young fart, I know, but pictures of mobs bulldozing into stores, their eyes lit up with naked greed at the thought of the bargains inside, highlight a side of human nature that’s a little unseemly to me. Kind of like Reality TV shows.

Anyway, how about this lovely--and very sharp--little sword…?

I’m a bad bad person.

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Making my own personal NaNoWriMo

November is turning out to be one of those months. Certain projects (curse my atrophied artistic skills) are stubbornly refusing to get finished. I think I'll run from the official NaNoWriMo and make December my own personal NaNoWriMo instead.

A week or so of clearing out the nagging remnants of old projects and then 50,000 words of juicy Succubus Summoning here we come!

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Some Naughty Little Bondage Elves For Christmas

The season of new manyeyedhydra stories is not quite over. Literotica have kicked off their Winter Holidays competition and I have a runner. Because it's the season of goodwill, blah, blah, blah, etc., etc., I did the usual thing and entered a nasty horror story with lashings of gratuitous and inappropriate sex.

You might never look at Santa the same way ever again:

"What Bad Boys Get For Christmas."

Perfect bedtime reading for unruly children...

Bad Horror-Head! Get back in your cave!

With another anthology opportunity/deadline presenting itself and my glacial art skills leaving the cover for Succubus Summoning 101 still at the top of the Urgently To Do list, this is a bad month to attempt NaNoWriMo. I think I'll set myself my own personal NaNoWriMo from Mid-Nov to Mid-Dec to see if I would have achieved it with a clear run right from the start.

Saturday, November 12, 2011

Don't Judge a Game by the Cover: Catherine

A little tale. I was in my local video games store. They’re a small store, so they tend to only stock the latest AAA titles. I was surprised to see Catherine sitting on the shelf. Catherine is an odd little Japanese game made by Atlus, the same people that did the Persona series. I’d been interested in picking it up, but had resigned myself to having to order it through Amazon or someone like that as my local games shop is useless and only stocks the latest slick-but-empty titles from Activision/EA.

I mentioned my surprise to the girl behind the counter.

“Oh, that one’s been popular. There are not many games for girls.”

Feeling my manliness being called into question, I of course responded with:

“Um. It’s a horror game.”

Doubtful glance from girl behind counter.

“A pair of girls bought a copy yesterday.”

“I’m pretty sure it’s a horror game,” I said rather feebly as I handed over my money.

I don’t think she believed me.

It’s understandable as the cover looks like this:

But the game is actually this:

The uh-thing is firing pink hearts out of its mouth. I guess that’s girly. Right?

Despite the titillating nature of the promotional material, another reviewer summed it up correctly by describing it as an adult game without being an “adult” game. This isn’t Monster Girl Quest. It is, however, completely bonkers and a lot of fun. Well worth checking out. I'm also glad to see it's sold a lot as well, this bodes well for a future where oddball games can exist.

And Catherine, the character, is completely adorable, even if she is a [Spoilers!]

(Oh, and I know the concept of girl’s games and boy’s games is/should be an anachronism in this day and age, but you know what I mean--I hope!)

Wednesday, November 09, 2011

I'm on Goodreads

Goodreads is kind of like a Facebook for readers/writers. I set up an account a while back, but it was classed as a reader account and didn't link to my books because I'd used "M. E." as the first name rather than "M.E.". Ah, CompSci string matching. Anyway, I set up an author page over the weekend, which is here.

I'm not sure how I'm going to use it just yet, but I'm sure it will come in useful at some point.

I might move onto other social media at some point for the filthy book plugging. I tried with Facebook a while back, but it seemed a little finicky when I tried to create a page for this pseudonym rather than the real actual me, and given Facebook's inconsistent approach to what should remain hidden, I really don't want to risk the separate identities being linked!
Until we've finished absorbing and assimilating this foolish human. Hssss...

Of course there's always FetLife, but I'm a little scared of the girls my stories might attract... :)

Saturday, November 05, 2011

Succubus Summoning NaNoWriMo

National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) is an annual writing competition to encourage people to quit procrastinating and finally focus their energies to spit that novel out. It’s a simple goal – write 50,000 words in the month of November.

I’ve been wanting to give it a go for a couple of years, but in the past I’ve been too busy finishing up final edits for anthologies and panicking about deadlines to take best advantage of it. Technically, this year is no different. I still have the cover/final tweaks to finish on Succubus Summoning 101 and need to finish two stories for a fourth collection. Then I thought, what the heck, I’ll sign up anyway. I might not get to 50,000, but if I get a good chunk of a novel idea done it will have achieved its purpose.

I also have an outstanding writing project that could use a little push to get over the edge. It’s time to finally drag Succubus Summoning 201 off the backburner and continue Phil’s (mis)adventures.

Tuesday, November 01, 2011

All Hallow's Read: The First Time

A little later than planned, but here's the brand new story I promised to post for All Hallow's Read. It goes without saying that the language gets a little fruity later on. If you're not an adult, begone now. If you are, don't be reading this anywhere the boss might see. ;)

Happy Halloween and enjoy!

* * * * * * *

The First Time

JT Suggs left the note on the counter and walked out of the house. He walked past nice but bland suburban houses as he left his quiet cul-de-sac and turned down the road that led into the centre of town. He walked down leafy lanes alongside a seldom-used railway line. In the centre, opposite the shining glass edifice of the local Tesco supermarket, he hopped on a bus to the neighbouring, bigger town. At the main bus station there he caught another bus that was heading out to an anonymous district on the fringe of the town centre. He didn't have a map; he'd already memorized the route after looking it up on the internet.

JT's heart thudded in his chest as took his seat on the second bus. He trembled with a barely suppressed cocktail of excitement and trepidation. He'd been struggling to keep it all in since he'd made that phone call at lunchtime and been aroused by the seductive, velvet voice he'd heard on the other end.

He was finally going to do it.

The bus reached his stop. He got out, walked down the busy street, turned left and then left again, entering a plain little back street. He identified the door right away. The number was painted on the burgundy surface in white paint. The door was slightly ajar.

JT's heart pounded in his ears.

He walked right by, continuing almost to the point where the side street opened out into the main thoroughfare again. He turned around, walked back, passed the slightly ajar door again.

Yes or no? He wasn't forced to. He could walk back to the stop, catch the bus and return home.

No! He was fed up of having it hanging over him.

Heart pounding, pulse pumping, hands trembling, JT walked up to the door, drew in a deep breath, pushed it open and stepped inside. A small hallway led to a staircase and then up to another short corridor that terminated in a plain white door with an intercom on the wall next to it. Pictures on the walls of beautiful models with come-hither eyes and dressed only in skimpy underwear gave more of an indication of this establishment's function.

JT pressed a button on the intercom. He heard a buzzing sound and a click as the door was unlocked from the other side. The door swung open and JT was greeted by an attractive, busty girl wearing nothing but a skimpy black negligee. Very busty, JT thought, unable to stop his gaze slipping down to the impressive curves of her chest.

"Welcome to Sinful Delights," the girl said. She smiled at JT.

JT mumbled back. His tongue felt like it had swelled up to twice its size and soaked up all the moisture in his mouth. He followed the girl inside.

Beyond both the exterior and interior door, the massage parlour saw no need to mask its presence anymore. JT walked into an open room with a leather sofa against one wall and a stripper's pole in the corner. The walls were decorated with lurid neon tubes twisted into 'XXX' signs and the outlines of sexy devil girls. The room was dim and everything was tinged red in the low light.

Two girls sat on the sofa. One was a blonde with long silky hair and a frilly white blouse, the other was an extremely busty girl with flame-red hair. The redhead wore a tight-fitting, shiny black PVC catsuit. All three girls looked like they'd stepped fresh from the set of a high-class porn flick.

JT had a mental checklist of items that needed to be satisfied for him to go through with this. One of them was the girl needed to have a minimum standard of good looks. If he was going to pay for it, it had to be with a girl he wouldn't be ashamed of picking up in a meat market after a night on the pull.

JT didn't pick up girls at the local meat market after a night on the pull. He wouldn't be here if he could. The principle was still the same. If he wouldn't be interested in the girl if they met under disco lights, why would he want to pay for it with her?

All three were way hotter than any girl he'd have a chance of speaking to under disco lights.


"I'm Sally," the girl who'd led him in said. "This is Mint and Asami," she gestured first to the blonde and then the redhead. "We're all available at the moment."

Both Mint and Asami smiled at JT. Their full, glossy lips glistened in the low red light.

That was another checkbox on JT's list. He wanted the girl to seem interested. He didn't want anyone who looked bored, disinterested or miserable.

The two girls pouted seductively at JT and pushed out their chests, accentuating their already impressive busts.

JT gulped.


"Who would you like?" Sally asked.

JT honestly didn't know. He thought this part would be straightforward. There'd be one girl that ticked his boxes and he'd pick her. He hadn't expected to find three girls way way better than his expectations. What did he want? Sweet, filthy, girlfriend experience, porn star... He hadn't given it much more thought than getting laid. Maybe they had specialities he could ask about? JT paused while he tried to make up his mind.

"I'll take him," Asami said, standing up from the sofa.

Wasn't he supposed to make that choice? JT thought. He didn't complain, though, as Asami took his hand and led him through a door at the back of the room. She was fucking hot. And kind of kinky in her shiny, tight black PVC.

Intimidating, but kinky.

More importantly, she looked like she knew what she was doing. Given his inexperience, it might be best if the girl took the upper hand. Asami looked like a girl who liked to take the upper hand.

She led him up some stairs--JT admired the shiny curve of her ass--and into an intimate bedroom. Like the room downstairs, the bedroom had been decorated as a neon temple to seedy pleasures. Dim lighting illuminated the psychedelic swirls on the walls. The 'bed' was a transparent orange plastic inflatable that looked somewhere in between a mattress and a beanbag.

"How long?" Asami asked in a velvet voice.


JT was too busy staring at her vinyl-covered body. She was hot. Really fucking hot. Beneath the gleaming curves of her bosom her body tapered down to a perfect wasp waist and then swelled back out into a luscious ass on top of long, lithe legs. Her PVC catsuit clung to her like a second skin and gleamed in the low light. This was his fantasy. In flesh.

"It's fifty pounds for half an hour, seventy-five for the full hour," Asami said.

JT realised it was the same velvet voice he'd heard on the phone earlier that day.

"Um, sorry," JT said. "Can we start with half an hour and see how it goes?" he asked.

"Of course," Asami said.

She switched on a stereo and the quiet strains of some kind of goth electronica with haunting female vocals added to the background ambience.

"I'm not...very experienced at this," JT said.

Asami looked him up and down.

"First time," she said.

Was it that obvious? Yeah, JT supposed it was. Twenty-three, and still obviously a virgin. Still obviously a loser.

He nodded.

"You'll be fine." The smile she gave him was pure filth. "Now take off your clothes."

JT kicked off his shoes and unbuckled his belt.

"I didn't think I'd end up doing this," JT said. "Paying for it."

He dropped his trousers and stepped out of them.

"I'm not a heartthrob, I know that, but I thought I'd find someone. Everyone finds someone."

He'd thought that. Two years at a sixth form college, three years as an undergraduate, and now two years into his post-graduate studies hadn't borne it out.

He unbuttoned his shirt. Asami didn't offer any comments. She watched him with an amused smile on her face and a latex-gloved hand resting against her slinky hips.

"It's not the embarrassment, or the jokes, or the sense of missing out," JT explained.

Although they did get fucking annoying--and old--very quickly.

"I'm scared I'm going to meet this girl, and she's going to be just right, perfect and everything, and then we're going to go to bed together, and I'm going to fuck it all up and be all crap because I haven't had sex before, and that girl--someone I really like--is going to be gone when I wake up the next morning."

He took off the rest of his clothes.

"Does it sound bad if I say I'm doing this for practise?" he asked.

She probably thought he sounded like a loser, but was too interested in his money to let it show.

Asami's gaze dipped down to JT's crotch. She moistened her lips with her tongue.

She looked keen. He hadn't expected that. He'd expected someone a bit more...detached. Professional. Fucking loads of different blokes all the time must get old quick; he was under no illusions there. While he would have liked to have found a prostitute that was girlfriend and porn star all rolled into one, his little checkbox was more prosaic: Gives it more enthusiasm than a corpse.

Asami definitely showed enthusiasm in her bright brown eyes. He could almost kid himself she wanted him. She must be a good actor, or maybe he was letting his own wishful desires superimpose thoughts and emotions that weren't really there.

She was still fully dressed.

"What about you?" he asked.

Her PVC catsuit looked damn hot, but it was going to make intercourse difficult, and that was what JT was here for, to get his damn cherry popped. He wasn't going to be fobbed off with a handjob, blowjob, or any of the other tricks.

"I want to go the whole way," he said.

That was another checkbox--nothing less than full vaginal intercourse. The cherry WAS going.

"You do, do you," Asami said. Her brown eyes twinkled and her moist red lips curled up in a sultry smile.

She reached between her legs and pulled down a zip, exposing the shaved valley of her sex to JT. He saw the folds of her sex--light pink on the outside and darker on the inside.

Blood rushed to his temples. He felt a little dizzy. He was going to do it. He was actually going to do it.

Asami found another zipper just below her neck. She pulled it down, exposing first the shadowy crease of her cleavage, and then pulling it further and further down, revealing more and more of the soft swell of her breasts. Free of the constraints of her tight bodysuit, they looked even bigger. The opened V of her outfit was deep enough to expose the pink circles of her nipples.

Wow. What a body, JT thought.

"Do you like what you see?" Asami pushed the soft pink curves of her boobs together.

"Yea-eah," JT replied.

He couldn't take his eyes off them. What the hell was a girl like this doing stuck in a place like this?

"I can see," Asami smirked as she glanced down at his crotch.

JT looked down. Of course he had a noticeable stiffy.

Asami took two brisk strides, placed her hands on his chest and shoved him backwards. JT fell right into the big, see-through mattress-cum-beanbag thing. It was squishy, but dry squishy. The surface felt like soft, smooth rubber and it was quite comfortable to lie in.

Asami didn't waste any time. She'd already climbed on top to straddle him. One gloved hand pressed down on JT's chest while the other reached down to stroke his twitching hard-on.

"Shouldn't I be wearing a cond--"

He didn't get a chance to finish. Asami positioned the swollen head of his cock at the entrance to her vagina and pushed her hips down, sliding his whole length inside her. She pouted her moist porn star lips and made sultry moans of pleasure as she swallowed him.

JT felt the silky smooth lining of her pussy slide against his unprotected dick. He felt pressure as her tight vaginal walls squeezed up around him. He'd barely been able to contain his excitement since entering the massage parlour and this sensation was far too much. He closed his eyes, released a little sigh and felt his hips give an involuntary twitch as he popped and spunked cum inside her.

Oh, that felt good, JT thought.

Oh, was that it?

He'd come so quickly. This was why he'd decided to give up and pay for it. How crap would it be if he'd performed like this with a girl he really loved? She'd never get into bed with him again.

"Sorry," he said. Even if Asami was a hooker, it still felt appropriate.

She paused on top of him. Her spine was arched back and up, with her head tilted to the ceiling. Her big round boobs were pushed out above JT's chest. She held that pose and JT felt a cold flash of alarm. He'd just spunked his load right up inside her pussy. Without a rubber johnny. He didn't think he was allowed to do that.

Was she going to go all ape-shit crazy on him?

No. She looked down at him with a vulpine smile on her full red lips.

"You don't need to apologise," she said, all velvet and cream. "Not at all."

She shifted position on top of him, keeping his still hard dick deep inside her. The soft, fleshy entrance to her cunt squeezed around the base of his cock, holding him in place. Deeper inside her, the moist walls of her vagina throbbed and pulled on his dick. Whoa, could girls do that? Her pussy was sucking on his cock and it felt about a million times better than his hand had ever done.

"We've only just started," Asami said.

Her eyes changed colour. Her hazel irises became red rings, as if they'd been injected with blood. The pale pink of her overflowing breasts darkened, becoming redder.


She dropped down on top of him and murmured sweet pleasures as she squashed the great soft mounds of her boobs against his naked chest and rubbed them against him. The strong musky scent of her perfume settled over him like a blanket. Her arms slid under his back and she embraced him tightly. Her body was hot--not in the metaphorical sense, but real actual heat hot. Her thighs gripped and squeezed his sides. She rolled her hips against him, rubbing the silky smooth walls of her pussy against the still swollen head of his cock.

Her heat and scent were stifling. Before JT could question what was happening, she pressed her soft lips against his mouth in a scorching kiss.

Her breath felt like flames streaming into his body. Her fire found something combustible within JT and ignited it. Even though he'd just come, he felt he could go again and again and again. Blood boiled through his veins. It felt like a head of steam was building in his testicles and they ached from the mounting pressure.

Her vagina coerced him with teasing little squeezes. Her moist walls gripped him--tugged, sucked. JT's muscles tensed. He was coming. Again. Already. He gasped into her kiss and his hips twitched as he released the pressure into the welcoming clasp of her sex.

Uh. So good, but intense enough to scare him.

Asami broke off the kiss with an orgiastic sigh of pleasure. She tipped her head back and JT saw she wasn't just a wanton hooker, she was a devil. His eyes widened.

Her complexion had darkened to red. She still had the same gorgeous, glamour puss face and porn star pout, but her skin was as red as blood. Her irises glowed like hot coals. Horns curled down through her tangle of flame-red hair. Beyond her shoulders JT saw the black leathery sheets of her folded up wings.

He was fucking a devil.

A devil was on top of him and fucking him.

Wisps of white vapour danced between her glossy red lips. She sucked them down with an ecstatic sigh.

"Delicious," she purred.

JT saw the same wisps escaping his own mouth. It was from him. She was gulping down him.

Then she was lying back down on top of him again--warm pillows of her breasts pressing against him, hot lips wrapped around his. The fires burned higher in JT, fanned by her lust. He couldn't do anything. He was overwhelmed by the urge to fuck, fuck, fuck. He started to thrust his hips back at her, aided by the springy rubber mattress beneath him, wanting to push his cock deeper into the fleshy pit of her sex.

Asami gave another sultry moan. Her soft vagina bunched up around the root of his cock and rolled up the shaft in an irresistible, tugging suction. JT's muscles clenched again and he felt his cock swell inside her as he spurted another full load of cum into her hungry pussy.

Lost in the throes of an even stronger orgasm, JT opened his mouth and let loose a gasp. Asami placed her hands on either side of his head and let her lips form a seal around his. She caught the vapour escaping from JT and drew it into her body.

She was burning him up.

Burning him out.

He couldn't stop. The fire was out of control, tearing through his body. He was fuel and she was going to consume him until he was completely spent.

Asami broke off the kiss with another euphoric sigh.

"Yes, I think I'll slurp you all up," she said.

She looked down at JT and gave him a vulpine smile.

"It's not often we get to fully consume one of our guests. Too noticeable if too many men disappear. So we take a little portion of their sexual energy and let them leave none the wiser."

She ran a black-gloved finger down JT's chest.

"Such light snacks are so unsatisfying," she said. "Sometimes we treat ourselves to a proper meal. The occasional man can go missing without any suspicion arising. No one will know."

She placed her hands on his shoulders and moved on top of him with smooth thrusts of her hips. The full red globes of her overflowing breasts bobbed up and down. JT felt the wet friction of her hot vaginal walls as his cock moved back and forth inside her.

"You're my feast and I'm going to enjoy you to the full," Asami purred.

"Someone will know," JT said.

More white vapour escaped from between his lips and Asami drew it into her body with a sultry sigh. He felt the same plumes escape through his penis as the succubus--she could be nothing else--gave his member another soft squeeze with her vagina and sucked another long ejaculation from his body. She took his vitality with it. He had no strength to resist. The heat of her body wrapped around him sapped out all his fight and he sank deeper into the soft rubber mattress.

"No one ever tells a soul when they go to visit a prostitute," she laughed. "Now lie back and enjoy your final moments. All our men do."

The room was darkening. There was a sulphurous odour in the air that mingled with the twin pungent aromas of her sex and perfume. The music was gone and instead JT thought he heard flames roaring off in the distance. And screams. Many countless screams.

"I did," he said, little more than a wheeze. "I left a note. On the counter at home. Just in case."

Asami stopped. Her lush lips narrowed into a frown. She gripped the sides of his head and forced him to look straight up into her burning eyes. Her gaze filled his world. It swallowed him whole and violated the hidden and secret corners of his soul.

The corner of her lips turned up in a little half-smile.

"So you did," she said. "What a clever cautious boy."

JT shuddered as the soft smothering walls of her vagina relaxed and released his organ. The flow of his essence into her black womb was cut off. The sudden removal of the pleasure she'd caused him felt as bad as a kick to his groin.

"How disappointing," the succubus said. "If I don't let you return home a number of irritating persons are sure to visit here and ask a lot of inconvenient questions. I can't allow that. My sisters would be most displeased with me."

Her finger traced circles around his nipple.

"Lucky boy. It seems I must content myself with a snack after all."

She pursed her lips together and blew JT a kiss. Her breath expanded out into a spectral pink heart that enveloped JT's face. It streamed up his nostrils and settled within the hidden lobes and folds of his brain. She used it to work on the substance of his mind--breaking some connections, rewiring others; gently shaping and remoulding his memories as it suited her.

* * * *

JT thought he'd feel more elated.

It had been good, he thought as sat on the bus home. At least he'd thought it had been good. The intensity of the memory had already faded to a kind of haze. It didn't matter. He'd done it. He'd finally had sex--paid-for-sex, but sex nonetheless. That damn cherry was no longer hanging over him.

Strangely he felt a little empty, hollow even. There was a nagging feeling he'd lost something without being aware of what it was. Stupid guilt, probably.

He got home and saw the handwritten note he'd left on top of the kitchen counter. It had the address of the massage parlour. He'd left it for his mother in case 'something' happened to him and he didn't get back before she finished work. He didn't know what that 'something' might be other than massage parlours were illicit and vaguely criminal and it would be best to be on the safe side just in case he ended up being drugged, abducted and having his kidneys removed for the black market.

It was silly, really. Of course nothing had happened. This was the real world, not a stupid gangster flick. He should have been more worried about his bus getting stuck in traffic, or his mother finishing work unexpectedly early and getting back before him. That would have left him with some awkward and extremely embarrassing questions to answer.

Smiling, JT crumpled up the useless note and tossed it into the bin.