Friday, February 07, 2020

New Story - "The Succubus Heart Squad"

Oh, and this one is up on Literotica, so everyone can read it.

The Succubus Heart Squad

Piotr Kurtzburg is your average nerdy software developer.  Normally, he doesn't get anything for Valentine's Day.  This year he gets a surprise as a statuesque beauty wearing nothing but a longcoat over lingerie hand delivers a card and chocolates.  Who are they from and just what is the 'Heart Squad'?

Yes, this is the complete "The Heart Squad", that mini-serial I started a couple of years back and then abandoned.

It's for Literotica's Valentine's Day story competition.  Every year, at this time of year, I drag it out and try to finish it, and every year I fail to do so.  Except this year.  To be honest, I didn't think I'd finish it.  I was a bit late getting the latest House of Hellish Harlots demo out and didn't think I'd left myself enough time.

Then I wrote 6,000 words on Tuesday...

I hope you enjoy it.  I'm also hoping I didn't allow too many typos to slip through.  My usual editing process is to leave the work on the side for a couple of weeks and then go back with fresh eyes.  As I was still finishing off the 1st draft on the day it was supposed to be submitted, I might have had to shortcut that process somewhat.  So, it might not be as 'tight' as usual.  It's one of those stories I might end up tweaking again when I come to put it into an ebook collection.  Any feedback would be helpful to that end.

(There are sneaky hints to another one of my characters, but it shouldn't matter if you haven't read any of her stories - it's Valentine's Day, just enjoy the succubus orgy!)


  1. Huh. Up until the mention of that certain other character who sent the Heart Squad to the MC, I though we were going to witness them killing him. Good job on stretching out the suspense.

    1. Phew. That was what I was aiming for. I wasn't sure I'd kept it sneaky enough (or had maybe made it so sneaky, people reading would end up feeling confused at the end.) The first draft had a lot more mentions of the certain other character, but I chopped those sections out as it took away from the tension and also made those sections drag.

      I couldn't quite find a closer as good as the wreath in Halloween at McHooligans. I think that might have been why it was on the backburner for so long.

  2. If you're still interested in eroge recommendations, here's one for Succubus in Wonderland, the latest game from the makers of Lust Grimm. PV here: